The alarm goes off. I push snooze. I lay in bed praying for the upcoming day. My to-do list is long, but I have a great feeling about the day. I get Clint off to work. I sit down and do my Bible study. I am ready for the day.
I put on my shoes, pump myself up, and start my workout. I am a sweaty mess, but the day ahead has such potential. Jude bursts through the door and gives me a huge smile. Seth is not far behind, a little bit groggy, but just as happy for the day. I put them in the bathtub as I finish lifting weights. And then I hear it.
“Jude! Why did you do that?!?!”
{ SPLASH }
“AAAHHH!!!! Mama!!!”
Suddenly, the day does not look so wonderful. My patience is already wearing thin, and we have not even had breakfast.
Typically, I would react with irritation and frustration. I hear a scream, and I react. As soon as I react, I regret what I have done. Reactions are done without thought and are usually too harsh. They provoke more reactions from everyone around. Instead of being diffused, the situation spirals into a long, drawn out, and even more frustrating ordeal.
A response is different. It is thought out. It is calm. It is under control. How do you train yourself to respond instead of react? I have been working with the boys on the fruit of the Spirit from Galatians 5, especially patience, kindness, and self-control. All the fruit, but especially these three, are key when responding instead of reacting.
Throughout the day, I sing the fruit of the Spirit to the boys. Seth and Jude both love music. They love singing, dancing, and playing instruments. Music has always had a calming effect on them. I sing the fruit just for fun; I sing it when they start to fight; I sing it when they get grumpy and start to whine. Almost immediately, attitudes change. It gives me time to stop and think about what I should do, when normally I would abruptly react .
I knew that they liked the song and hearing the fruit of the Spirit. I knew that it was helping me to gain control, rather than do something hurried and harsh. However, I was not sure how deep my effort was going into their little hearts. Were really hearing the words of the song? Were they thinking about how to be patient, kind, and in-control?
One afternoon, Jude was playing, I was washing dishes, and Seth was doing homework. Seth looked at me, and said, “Mom? Can you sing that song again? The one about the fruit? I really like hearing you sing it during the day.”
As I shepherd these little boy hearts, it is important for me to model how they are to behave. If I constantly react to them, all I will teach them is to react to me, each other, and the people they encounter. It is my responsibility to teach them to “play it again,” and respond with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
whatever is honorable 